AREN’T YOU AFRAID??? (I get asked that a lot lately)

I CHOOSE not to live in fear, because if I did it would consume me. Let me explain…



This week I have been asked several times about my fears. “How do you handle being married to a police officer? That must be hard. Doesn’t it scare you?”  “Your husband has a motorcycle? Those are too dangerous. Aren’t you afraid he’ll crash?” I actually get those two specific questions about fear several times a year and every time I have the same response… I CHOOSE not to live in fear, because if I did it would consume me. Let me explain…

I’ve been there. I’ve lived in fear. I’ve gone through the “what if’s” and dwelled on all of the bad things that could happen: He could get shot. He could get hurt. He could crash his bike. He could, he could, he could…. and yes, HE COULD! BUT what people don’t think about is the fact that no matter what job he has or what form of transportation he chooses, there are still risks.

Factory workers get hurt. People get into car accidents every day. And in all honesty…he’s gotten more concussions from playing high school sports than he’s had injuries from being a police officer. (He even got a concussion while play slow-pitch softball!!!) When you really think about it we all live with dangers every day. Yes, the fact that he is a police officer puts him at a greater likelihood of injury statistically but what people don’t realize is the number one reason I tell them I don’t have to worry…HE’S NOT ALONE.

When we lived up in northern Wisconsin and he was working part-time on the road he was alone. When he was working in the jail it was him and one other officer in the entire jail and for the most part he was alone. Here in Green Bay he is NEVER alone. Even when he is sent to a call by himself his partners on the road know where he is and they have a brotherhood/sisterhood beyond explanation. They can read the tone in each other’s voices so well that they know when the other needs help without them having to ask. They have learned how each one sounds on the radio and what type of calls they need to back each other up on. Then on those calls that he is sent to alone, if he does need help I know that when he does call for backup it is never far away. There are so many other officers with their eyes and ears looking out for each other that I can sit here right now knowing that he is as safe as he could be out there on the road. That helps me sit here and go on with my daily activities without constantly wondering if he’s ok.

But then there’s the other way he’s not alone. My husband and I have talked about this intimately and often and we have an understanding. The Lord is ultimately the one who has complete control and it is up to Him whether we are all here to live another day. The Bible tells us to not fear. He tells us in Joshua 1:9

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

English Standard Version (ESV)

This has become one of our family verses. My son wears it around his neck on a necklace. My husband has a sign hanging in his locker at work. It is on a sign on our dresser at home. It is the life verse we have given our sons and it has gotten us through countless times of fear. Now, I’m not saying living without fear is easy, but as I shared in an earlier post, I used to live in fear when our boys were younger and it was of no use to me. It did not bring peace, it surely didn’t let me sleep well at night so I had to give it up to the Lord. I ultimately cannot stop anything from happening, good or bad. I can’t prevent illness. I can do things to try to protect myself. I can take precautions to be safe but ultimately I do not have the power to prevent or allow the things that happen in our lives, so why spend my time living in fear?

I tell people my husband was born to be a police officer, and I truly believe that. He is an excellent officer and the world needs men like him out there fighting for what is right. If I were to tell him I didn’t want him to be a cop and he was to go work another job, how would that be fair to him and how would that show my true faith in the One who commands our days? If Jesus could control the waves during a storm who am I to question if He has control over what happens in my life?

When our boys were babies and wouldn’t go to sleep there were two songs I would sing to them over and over until they were sleeping…Take me Out to the Ballgame and His Eye is on the Sparrow. Two completely different songs, I know, but one shared our love of our earthly passions, sports and one shared our love of our Heavenly Father.  Singing this calmed my boys as I held them and rocked them in my arms, but it also calmed my fearful heart on those dark, lonely nights he was working and I was home deciding whether or not to fear. I encourage you to consider the options that come with choosing or dismissing fear and then work and pray to dismiss it. It is life changing and I’m not looking back. I come back to this song often and I encourage you, if you deal with fear to carefully consider its words and then focus on the One who delivers us from our fears. There are days when fear tries to creep back in and I have to battle to kick it back out of my life but these words help me every time and I hope they can help to bring you peace, too…

“His Eye Is On The Sparrow”
(feat. Tanya Blount)
[Tanya Blount:]
Why should I feel discouraged
Why should the shadows come
Why should my heart feel lonely
And long for heaven and home

When Jesus is my portion
A constant friend is he
His eye is on the sparrow
And I know he watches over me
His eye is on the sparrow
And I know he watches me

[Lauryn Hill:]
I sing because I’m happy
I sing because I’m free
His eye is on the sparrow

And I know he watches
[Tanya:] He watches me
[Lauryn:] His eye is on the sparrow
And I know he watches
[Tanya:] I know he watches
[Lauryn:] I know he watches me

[Lauryn & Tanya:]
I sing because I’m happy
I sing because I’m free
His eye is on the sparrow

[Lauryn:] And I know he watches me
[Tanya:] He watches me
[L&T:] His eye is on the sparrow
[Tanya:] And I know he watches me
[Lauryn:] He watches me
[Tanya:] He watches me, I never thought…
[L&T:] He watches me


If you’d like to listen please click on the link below, click on the orange “play” circle near the top, then close your eyes, listen to the words and let the fear melt away.

God Bless!



Fear picture from:

Photo of Sparrow on barbed wire found at:



Author: truebluewife

Having lived the life of a law enforcement wife for 20 years, I am now finding my way as the wife of a retired police officer and the aftermath of living the active LEOW life. I've survived breast cancer and am living the battle daily to press on to tell my story and remind others that "cancer" doesn't stop affecting the patient when the cause is's just the beginning of fighting to stay cancer-free! Wife and mother of two boys, the older now doesn't get easier just because he retired, it just becomes a different adventure. Breast cancer survivor, Special Education teacher, wife, mother, daughter and friend...I bring all of these topics to my posts as I find that sharing my thoughts helps me process and makes me a better human. I never know what will come out of my brain an onto the page, but I know it will always be interesting.

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